After months of practically no anxiety, I remember being hit by a tsunami wave of Anxiety on the last week of September, 2021. That entire week felt like walking through sludge, constantly choked in my throat, and drained.
I found myself wanting to hide in my room, keep the lights dimmed, and stick to neutral or black clothing. Anything else seemed like ‘too much.’ Too stimulating, too fake, too cheery. I needed to just wallow.
And here’s the thing. When you’re IN an anxious spiral, your mind & body is constantly drained. It takes energy to just survive the present moment.
After a couple days of allowing myself to be still, to be sad, and to rest as much as possible, I realized that this way of being was no longer sustainable.
I booked a call with my coach (every coach needs a coach after all!), I began nourishing my body with energizing foods as best as I could, I started to pray again, and I pushed myself to spend time in nature.
Spending time outdoors allowed me to give my mind a break. I’d ground by walking barefoot, explore my senses by running my hand over rough tree trunks, stretch my ears to hear far-off bird calls, and breathe in the forest scent.
Keeping my focus strictly on my physical body allowed my racing thoughts and heavy emotions to take a backseat, so that when I was prepared to listen to my mental chatter, I could choose when and how. This was a small way of feeling in control of my anxiety, rather than it controlling me.
As I would walk through nearby trails, it was the bright Fall colours that soothed me. In comparison to the harsh lighting of my phone and the dullness of my room, I felt a sense of refreshment when outdoors. I realized how much I was depriving myself of colour during this time.
Colour is food for the soul. And my soul felt completely dull. It needed vibrance, life, and light in order for me to break through this anxious cycle.
I started to ask myself ‘which colours am I craving?’
The answers came right away: dusty rose, forest green, pale blues, and dark orange. I felt more me when surrounded by them. They quieted my mind and brought sense of lightness & peace to my shoulders and heart that I had been missing.
So I started to surround myself with these soothing colours.
I created a little plant corner in my room which I could turn to when I needed a break. I got rid of my too-dark and too-bright clothes that I couldn’t stomach wearing, and chose three/four cozy outfits that I just repeated: a cream sweater, sage green leggings, a dusty pink sweater, a pale grey top, and beige sweats.
As I adjusted my surroundings to embody a sense of peace, cleanliness, and life, I started to want to work on myself and heal.
After all, wanting change is the first step to achieving change.
I felt more energized to pull out my journal and figure out the triggers that started this spiral and how to break out of this pattern.
And I was able to do just that.
Once I coached myself out of this low, I continued feeding my soul just as one feeds their body. Colour Therapy became my go-to, along with non-negotiable nature time, vulnerable talks with my coach & friends, and re-focusing my purpose for each day.
It is SO important to go step-by-step and not expect extreme anxiety to turn into complete peace in one day. My first step was accepting the reality of my thoughts, and using colour & de-cluttering to create a physical space that promotes healing.
Without that first step, I never would have been able to move to step two of actually doing the inner work to fully heal.
Close your eyes, place your feet flat on the ground, take a few grounding breaths, and start sifting through colours in your mind.
Explore the various shades of red, green, blue, yellow, purple, orange, cream, grey, so on and so forth. Which colours feel soothing, enriching, authentic? Which colours align with emotions that you enjoy?
Maybe you find yourself drawn to confident reds or soothing blues. Maybe it’s the rich, healing essence of green or the happiness of yellow. Whichever colours pop out at you, start using them! Wear them, keep them on your desk, go out and seek them! It’s time to prioritize nourishing your soul.
If you want to go deeper faster, try out one FREE meditation circle with me! Our group meets over Zoom every Thursday at 7pm EST and it’s a beautiful way to gain insight into who you are, what you need to heal, and to learn the unique language of your body & mind.
Sign up here or send me an email at email@example.com for this week’s Zoom link!
Myra is a Certified Wellness Coach based near Toronto, Canada helping clients around the world step into true alignment.